All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
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When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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