the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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