she looked like the before picture.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize