it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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