ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
