I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
