while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
