Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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