omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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