Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
