O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
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