You just made me feel so damn special
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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