so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
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Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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