It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
last night I used snow as a chaser
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
