wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
