I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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