I've blown a few things in my day
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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