I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
