in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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