wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
