Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize