Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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