There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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