And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
