Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
