The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
