If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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