ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
