u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
