You made me cry and you don't even care
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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