my soul wont recognize me after tonight
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
