You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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