ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
