is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
