I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
