in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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