What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
