Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
He passed out mid-signature
she pinky promised me she was 18
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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