my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I have feelings that need drinking.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize
