My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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