No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
