You really coming over, don't trick.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
