Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
