think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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