he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
