Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does