Texts From Last Night

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  (850): View more from Florida

  She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever

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  (850): She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever http://tfl.nu/uwj0
  Replies (18) Good night (6220) Bad night (1503)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.

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  (403): Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl. http://tfl.nu/u7lt
  Replies (22) Good night (4567) Bad night (1599)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room

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  (541): dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room http://tfl.nu/exa4
  Replies (15) Good night (4032) Bad night (1139)
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  (213): View more from California

  there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.

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  (213): there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina. http://tfl.nu/2p84
  Replies (11) Good night (2766) Bad night (1090)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  How did you make it to work sans hangover?

  (816): View more from Missouri

  4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols

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  (660): How did you make it to work sans hangover? (816): 4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols http://tfl.nu/2csk
  Replies (8) Good night (2143) Bad night (1248)
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  (310): View more from California

  Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.

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  (310): Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show. http://tfl.nu/bzbb
  Replies (3) Good night (1340) Bad night (892)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Why do you think it's a no-pants party?

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.

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  (978): Why do you think it's a no-pants party? (603): Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation. http://tfl.nu/hg9g
  Replies (4) Good night (2998) Bad night (686)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose

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  (262): You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose http://tfl.nu/d8zc
  Replies (7) Good night (1657) Bad night (963)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been

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  (513): seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been http://tfl.nu/nato
  Replies (1) Good night (1083) Bad night (541)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.

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  (609): Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good. http://tfl.nu/lsij
  Replies (3) Good night (1331) Bad night (603)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls

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  (204): I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls http://tfl.nu/4n4b
  Replies (11) Good night (686) Bad night (1114)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Score one for dad.

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  (541): Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job. (503): Score one for dad. http://tfl.nu/kgah
  Replies (6) Good night (2190) Bad night (563)
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  (979): View more from Texas

  Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other

  (1-979): View more from Texas

  LOL its 11 am

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  (979): Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other (1-979): LOL its 11 am http://tfl.nu/yfdw
  Replies (7) Good night (1206) Bad night (478)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife

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  (651): My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife http://tfl.nu/29ie
  Replies (2) Good night (437) Bad night (794)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.

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  (804): The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette. http://tfl.nu/rkzr
  Replies (1) Good night (519) Bad night (292)

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