Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  No, drunk sperm still make babies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): No, drunk sperm still make babies. http://tfl.nu/xn33
  Replies (15) Good night (958) Bad night (5530)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page http://tfl.nu/1sgh
  Replies (37) Good night (990) Bad night (4137)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?

  (314): View more from Missouri

  you had an obligation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right? (314): you had an obligation. http://tfl.nu/0hhp
  Replies (20) Good night (7988) Bad night (682)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date. http://tfl.nu/1wwe
  Replies (51) Good night (7220) Bad night (1640)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful http://tfl.nu/oafq
  Replies (19) Good night (7280) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina http://tfl.nu/v35k
  Replies (22) Good night (1406) Bad night (3911)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka http://tfl.nu/h91z
  Replies (10) Good night (2302) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing. http://tfl.nu/78qs
  Replies (6) Good night (1863) Bad night (561)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck. http://tfl.nu/kvtv
  Replies (10) Good night (2453) Bad night (746)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported. http://tfl.nu/ojxl
  Replies (15) Good night (3937) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up http://tfl.nu/l4k9
  Replies (6) Good night (680) Bad night (1522)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (778): It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing http://tfl.nu/h5t5
  Replies (5) Good night (621) Bad night (913)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment http://tfl.nu/03jc
  Replies (9) Good night (1229) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level http://tfl.nu/zu28
  Replies (5) Good night (294) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex. http://tfl.nu/az8i
  Replies (1) Good night (301) Bad night (609)

Randomize