Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
