some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
i've created a new STD.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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