fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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