I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
And then my night got REAL pukey
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
