Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
