I think this baby is eyeing my beer
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
