carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
